Mom & the Saudi Arabian Fighter Pilots

​We learn a lot from our moms.  They teach us a host of useful skills and we love them for it. Think about it!  With dads and other family members we learn about: love, values, beliefs, manners, character, culture, customs, hygiene, dress, food, music, heritage, holidays, math, science, and language.  The list goes on.  Moms teach their children lots of stuff.  This tends to be a pretty universal trend around the world.  They are important. They are influential.  And, I know that on at least one occasion as an adult, my mom’s presence came to my rescue!!

​My mom is not a big woman.  She is short, small, and petite.  Diminutive is a good way to describe her.  She prefers quiet and order, not chaos and busyness.  She doesn’t like the limelight.  She would never be labelled as being gregarious, or aggressive.   She’s a homebody.  She travels only when necessary.  She has flown in an airplane a few times, but she would not want to be a pilot - EVER, much less a fighter pilot.  To look at her, you would certainly think that she was no match for a group of Saudi Arabian fighter pilots. But, you might want to think again.  She had something that they did not.

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​I had been teaching English as a Second Language (ESL) to international students for about ten years when I got a unique group.  I was asked to teach a high beginning level English class to a group of nine fighter pilots from Saudi Arabia.   It was shortly after the first Gulf War. 
 
The purpose of the class was to help the pilots improve their conversation skills in English.  It was also expected that increased proficiency in English would help them to communicate better with flight controllers worldwide.   The focus was mostly on helping them with English conversation and tightening up some grammar.
 
At the time, I was in my early 40s.  I loved teaching.  I had experience as an ESL instructor. I had a graduate degree and I was comfortable teaching my craft.  Over the years, I had handled my share of interesting classroom dynamics, and I was comfortable with the challenges that typically come with teaching ESL.  Or, so I thought!

​The fighter pilots were in their late 20s and early 30s.  They were all married with families at home in Saudi Arabia.  They all knew each other.  They had been given a six month window by their government to study English in the United States.  They were on an education-vacation, and they were enjoying themselves.  They were going to make the most of their time.
 
I was scheduled to meet with them several hours a day, five days a week, for three months.  The first two weeks went well, as we were all getting to know each other.  They had a rudimentary handle on basic conversational English.  And, they were not shy about communicating with what they knew. By the third week, though, a subtle battle for control of the class started to loom on the horizon.   The group of pilots was larger in number, confident, dominant, aggressive, and a bit cocky.  I was the teacher though, and it was my classroom, but I could feel that my control was being tested.
 
With tension increasing – at least on my part, I needed their respect.  I needed to not let learning spiral completely out of control.

​As the third week progressed, they had latched on to a “technique” in class.  Without realizing it, I had probably set them up when I had spent time teaching them how to ask questions in English.  We had practiced.  And then, they ran with it.  At full throttle. They began asking “Why?” or “Why do you say it that way?” or some variation of that construction over, and over, and over again.  It was happening all the time – coming from all nine of them – rapid fire.   

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​At first, I tried to field some of their questions, but I soon began to pick up that they really weren’t interested in an answer.  Body language soon told me that they just wanted to have fun.  The furtive looks between them. The puppy dog eyes. The innocent smirks soon gave them away.  They didn’t really care to know a reason “why, something was said a certain way”.  They were just using language, and they were testing boundaries.
 
It was early the fourth week, that I had a revelation.  I had an idea that I put in my back pocket.  I had a secret weapon that I thought might work. I was ready with a bit of my own flak.  I was going to get ahead of them and wrest back control of the class.
 
It wasn’t too long after the class was under way that the leader, and chief instigator, asked the question at hand, “Why, do you say it that way?”  
 
Without hesitation, I used the “Mom card”.  I simply said, “Because that’s what my mother taught me.”
 
There was a moment of stunned silence.  Then, there was a burst of unrestrained laughter.  The leader then replied, “We love your mother.”  “She’s a very smart woman.”  “She should come to Saudi Arabia.”
 
There is no doubt in my mind.  Mom saved the day!  From that point on, I didn’t have a problem with that group for the rest of the time we were together.  In fact, it became one of my more enjoyable classes.  It certainly became one of my more memorable classes.   It was not uncommon for someone to blurt out, “Why do you say it that way?” and one of the others would pipe up, “Because that’s what his mother taught him.”   We would all laugh.  Someone would invite my mom to Saudi Arabia – again.  Then, we would go on.
 
My mom was a hero to them, and to me - as she should be!  There was an influence that my mom had, simply because she was a mom.  She had the universal power of motherhood fully behind her.
 
When my mom and I would reminisce about it, we would chuckle when I reminded her of the sway she held over that group of Saudi fighter pilots.  She didn’t realize the reach of her international influence.  She was small in stature, but her influence was huge because of the “power of motherhood”.  Her influence was powerful in this situation, and also throughout my whole life.  I owe a lot to my mom for all that she has taught me.

​As I reflect on my response that day, it is true.  My mom (dad and brother) did teach me most of the basic conversational English that I use daily.   They taught me enough vocabulary and grammar to be understood by most English speakers, most of the time.  My mom may not be able to explain grammatical constructions – but that wasn’t needed.  When I said, “We goed to the store yesterday.”  She simply modeled the correct grammar by saying, “You’re right, we went to the store yesterday.”  She did it over and over until I got it.   I can imagine that your mom did the same thing.
 
I think it’s pretty special that moms (and dads) around the world – give their children the gift of language.  Think about it, God trusts families with the gift of communication, and a host of other basic life skills.  God uses families to launch the lives of the next generation.  God uses other people to form and influence us.  And, hopefully inform us about him.
 
At times when I start to make things overly complicated in my life.  I think back to my mom and that group of Saudi Arabian fighter pilots. I am reminded that sometimes it’s okay to keep things simple.  When asked why we do or say things the way we do, sometimes the easiest and most honest response is “because that’s what my mother taught me.”
 
Thanks Mom!

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Next Time: Forerunners

Photo Credit:
Top: Carr Collection: Missouri
Second: Image by David Mark from Pixabay 
​Third: Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay 
Bottom: Image by Amber McAuley from Pixabay